Why Your Lousy Goals Causing You Stress


I know what you’re going to say, everyone does, “A job worth doing is worth doing well”? Wrong.  A job worth doing is worth doing… lousy. Have I lost you already? Do you think I’ve gone crazy?  Well, my teacher and mentor, Dr. John Hinwood told me about a mentor of his (think it may have been Charlie Tremendous Jones) who instilled in him this lesson early in his career.  It then became a principle of Dr. John’s teachings and chiropractic care.

We become fixated on doing a job perfectly. In fact, if we can’t do a job perfectly, we won’t start it. But the greatest lessons are in the failure. Think about it.  We don’t learn to ride a bike unless we fall off it. We dust ourselves off and say “Well I won’t do that maneuver again”.

Bill Gates said, “it’s fine to celebrate success but is more important to heed the lessons of failure”.  The message in this is that your success is built on your failures.  One of the greatest stories of a company not waiting until something was perfect, is Apple.  They had already made head ways with the iPod and music playing technology but they were ready to launch into the mobile phone sector.  There were other leaders in the field, nipping at their heels.  Nokia and Blackberry were the big guns.  They too had the ”touch technology” in the pipeline but were wanting to make it perfect for release. Apple didn’t want to wait.  They launched their iPhone before the product was perfect.

The idea being that their loyal followers would give them feedback on what they liked and didn’t like about the product for future developments. It meant their purpose (being innovators in doing things differently) was well and truly cemented in modern culture. They didn’t wait until it was perfect. John Demartini talks beautifully about aligning your goals with your values.

Watch: Are your goals getting in the way of your Dreams


Quite simply, you’re not taking action, but why is that?  Sometimes it can be procrastination, but more importantly, we simply don’t value the project.  If the goal does not align with our core beliefs, our values then we are going to struggle to achieve it.  We become indecisive “Is this the right thing to do?”  When you are clear about your purpose, your vision, and your mission when you are clear on what you value most, there is no question, you can act immediately with confidence.  You will also find, things just happen and fall into place easily because you are aligned and attune to what is at the core of who you are.

Read: Why do I Procrastinate – The Shiny Object Syndrome


Perhaps you do feel the burn, but you don’t know where to start.  There is a big goal you are dying to achieve and each day, month or year goes by and you still haven’t taken action. Your stress sits on a foundation of hopelessness or anxiety.  The issue here is a lack of clarity.  Not knowing where or how to start, no clear direction or path towards the goal.

My favorite books are biographies.  Stories of those that have overcome adversity (such as “Mao’s last Dancer”, “The Pursuit of Happiness” and “Angela’s Ashes”). The common thread through all of these stories is persistence taking small gradual steps.  Chris Gardiner’s story is the most profound.  He talks about taking stock of how far you’ve come to motivated by how far you have to go.

By breaking the mountain down into single steps, the journey does not become arduous.  When coaching clients through stress management strategies, we use a special mind mapping design to easily and creatively plot out goals so that the client knows exactly what step to take and when in moving towards a big goal.

If you’re feeling stuck, stale or stagnant then you may wish to consider some Stress Management Coaching.

With regular stress management coaching, you will move beyond the frustrations and disappointments you may be currently feeling.  The coaching is not heavy going, rather concise half-hourly sessions that equip you with action steps and strategies to move forward.

This is not a story telling offloading session but a positive and constructive approach.  If you’d like to try a session, to feel it out and see if it’s a good fit, you can do so, absolutely FREE. Your first session is complimentary, for you to establish if stress management coaching is right for you.

Simply drop me an email or call me to get started.

About the Author:

Barbara Clifford (The Time Tamer) is a time management & stress management enthusiast based in Alice Springs, Australia.  She has spent over 20 years working in time precious and stressful industries such as film, hospitality and marketing.  She has always had a burning passion for creating order and making sense of things.  She is sought after like a beacon in a sea of chaos to provide professional development in the business environment through workshop training, coaching, mentoring, online training programmes, webinars and as a guest speaker around Australia.  Her professional experience has included contracts with small business, Not For Profits, Aboriginal Organisations, Media, Marketing, Aged Care, Universities, Health Services and Cruise Ships. Follow Barbara on Twitter @barbclifford.